In Celebration of Moms
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05/13/10 | The Women's Conference | 60 Comments




The Women's Conference Celebrates Moms

Maria Shriver on the profound power of motherhood and her own experience of being both a mother and a daughter.


 

We invited you to share your own personal stories about motherhood -- what your mom means to you or what it means to be a mom. The winners receive --


We've chosen the 3 winning comments. They are --

Kristy Campbell:

I’ve never felt as powerful as a mother as when I was 8 months pregnant sitting outside of the drug-testing lab with my teenage daughter. I had suspected something was going on with her and was adamant about finding out exactly what. As she screamed at me in the car about how much she hated me, I heard a voice come out of me that said… “Fine. Hate me. You'll hate me when you are 20, you'll hate me when you are 30, and you may hate me for the rest of your life. But, at least you will have a life from which to hate me. I am your mother. I am not your friend. And if you are doing drugs, I’m going to find out and deal with it.”

Our story has a drug-free happy ending and now 2 years later, my daughter is off to college and we are starting to evolve the mom/daughter relationship into a friendship. I love and value the current relationship I have with her, however, I know that if I hadn’t been a mother first to her, we would never be on this path to friendship.

stephsways:

I Love all the wonderful stories of 'Mommie and me,' by people who had warm milk by their bedsides and a fairytale told to them until their eye's were sealed with a loving kiss from Mom. At one time i couldn't stand to hear them. Mothers day was such a difficult time. It use to be, "Bah Hum-bug", on mothers day.

Mothers Day has always been a day of feeling guilty for giving Mom cards that didn't bare an ounce of truth of who we were. If i hadn't had such a great relationship with my own son, the yearly greiving over the relationship i never had with my Mom and achingly longed for, would have been unbearable. Yet as i go and grow through life i become more understanding of Mom's hurt and pain of never being loved by her own Mom. The suicide of my Dad, the loss of my oldest son, didn't help either one of us at all. But, when i tell you how much strength, courage, and love has risen in the midst of this family. Once i decided this generational abusive behavior would stop with me, It did. I was a single parent and my son who is now in law enforcement with a beautiful family. I was determined he would know without a doubt, he is loved. Now, i'm very passionate about leading others to a place of a 'Loving Reality'. I Love my Mom very much and now i know, she couldn't give what she never had.

Have a blessed Mother's Day and know, Love never fails.
May 2010

rrussell:

I and even more so my sisters are now my mother's mother. As my mother of 8 children in 10 years having just celebrated her 89th birthday is suffering from the early stages of alzheimers disease and her daughters have stepped up to care for her as she spent many years caring for us. I think how ironic this care is as we bath our mother in the same blue cast iron tub she use to bath us....was her hair as she use to wash ours, dress her as she use to dress us and feed her as she to feed us. But the one thing she still does for herself is to apply her make-up. Growing up I will always remember how mom taught us how to use make-up and to never leave the house without lipstick....needless to say my sisters and I always look fabulous when we leave our homes. 

Care for our parents comes full cycle. Many questions why we would do this instead of just putting mom in a 'home', but the choice my sisters and I have made is to care for mom as long as possible even as we care for our own families and self. Mom made room for us as we grew and now we are making room for mom. Happy Mothers Day..mom!


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Comments

  • Motherhood has an array of attributes as brilliant as a rainbow and as sacred as the meaning of the rainbow! Mother's are compared to mother nature and it is true, not only is it "not nice to fool mother nature" Mother's cannot be fooled. We were given special gifts that connect us to our children before they were ever born which gives us an innate bond with them forever. As compared to the rainbow a verse that best describes mother's is in I Corninthians 13, paraphrased "...Love is Patient and Kind, It is not Jealous or Boastful or Rude, Love bears all things, hopes all things, endures all things,believes all things, love rejoices over the truth, Love conquers all." We are warriors to protect, defend, nurture, provide, teach, understand, to love unconditionally and to be mature enough to take the arrows that they may direct at us when they are angry and turn them into answered prayers. Next to our creator, Mother's have the most important job in the universe, think about this one. Remember to, that the creator taught us that we will be judged as harshly as we judge others, so as mother's we simply need to love.

    Posted by Shelly Conley, 5 May 2010.

  • This Mother's Day is my daughter's first ...she now has her own daughter ..and to watch her is to see a reflection of all the amazing women who have shaped her life;her great-grandmothers who taught her about unconditional love and devotion. Her grandmothers who still today lead by their example of strength,humor and vitality. Her aunts and all of my lifelong friends who she can call at any time, day or night to share the joys,trials and frustrations of parenting and who always give her the best advice. And last, but not least I am reminded everyday that to be a mother is to love someone so deeply that they are a part of your heart and soul forever. Happy and Blessed Mother's Day to all the wonderful women and men in this world who share this love in their hearts for a child...anyone's child.

    Posted by Peggy Buehler, 5 May 2010.

  • I was one of ten children so my mother had to work very hard to keep everything going in our household. As a small child, my older sisters did a lot of the mothering so my mother could do the cooking and laundering and other tasks such as gardening.

    She spent a lot of hours growing and canning vegetables to feed us through the winter months. I don't think I truly appriciated all the sacrifices she made for us until I was much older with children of my own.

    Alone time with her was very limited, so I cherish to this day a trip we made to our state capitol in 1964. We took the train and she took me on a tour of the capitol building, the old territorial capitol restoration and McArthur House Museum.

    I never realized that all the values that I would some day hold dear and try to instill in my children would come from her because as a teen we seemed to do nothing but argue over political differences. Our views seemed so far apart.

    I fought to attend college because she felt education was the key to success. I found time to serve as the Mayor of our small community while raising two boys alone. Though I'm now a grandmother, I still try to stay active in my community and as Mayor took the opportunity to mentor some of the children that lived here.

    My mother was never more than just that, and still at 91, she is everything to our family. Though my father also mothered us at times, I believe that she is the glue that keeps our family joined together and I fear that once she is gone, it will be difficult to maintain the same unity. I salute you Mom.

    Posted by DTELady, 5 May 2010.

  • Mom passed away last October due to Cancer. I am her legacy.
    A week before she died, i wrote the post for her in my blog.
    She was my anchor woman. I survived an almost fatal accident, i live on now, because of who she was.
    Please read my tribute to her in my blog-
    http://myprivategarden-sapling.blogspot.com/2009/10/she-pulled-me-through.html

    Be Bless :-)

    I am not from the USA. But i do follow Maria Shriver and The Woman Conference cause i believe in what you do.
    I just wanted to share my mom with you all.
    Thank you for this platform.

    Posted by Coretta, 5 May 2010.

  • Despite the fact my mother was 18 when I was born, and had 6 kids by 25, then left my father when I was 10, she took me with her; left the others in various places. My childhood was tragic, to say the least, and short. But she instilled great love in me, encouraged and lifted me to do and be whatever I wanted. I do believe her warmth and love kept me on track. I then went on my own at 15, put myself through High School and College, then had a baby boy of my own quite young and made a vow to never NOT be there for him... to this day. He is 20 at a great University. Later, I had twin girls, and through all of what I learned, most importantly, be there for them and treat them like little people, they are amazing 7-year old pistols. I have always had high profile jobs, but managed them in a way so I could take all the kids to school, pick them up, in other words, make them a priority and it shows. They are all self contained. They will not know hunger, sleeping in cars, etc. (The twins also have a great daddy.) My son, I played both roles, and he is an incredibly empathetic young man that meditates, gives to others and is full of confidence. Of course I sacrificed in my professional journeys, but I know what it is like to be abandoned, orphaned and never parented. They will never have to experience this, thus they all can pursue whatever they want, knowing their is a foundation. As for me, my mother is always the first one I call when I feel I can't go on. Or I want to check into a psych ward. And as a writer, all of these experiences have only enriched that. After the twins, I decided to make the leap and the rewards of now following my own dreams I owe to my children.

    Posted by raerae67, 5 May 2010.

  • My mother suffered from mental illness so my childhood felt like it was defined by her sick choices. She wasn't able to leave the house or drive a car after age nine. She was an alcoholic who married a child molesting alcoholic who practiced Freudian psychology and manipulated people in a very harmful way. After years of running away and coming back, I finally left when I was 18. I was pregnant, scared, and determined to live a good life. I went to live with my older sister in Virginia. My maternal grandmother gave me a monthly allowance so that I could raise my son independently without leaving him in daycare. Between my sisters, my grandmothers, my coworkers, and my friends, I was surrounded with a great deal of the nurturing that I had missed as a child. My son was born healthy, weighing 10 lbs! I was able to arrive at a definition of love very shortly after he was born; "Love is an action of giving that feels so good, you feel like you are giving to yourself" While this may sound narcissitic, it encompasses the importance of doing something to show that you love someone. My grandmothers were kind and gentle people who loved me unconditionally with grace and humility. I learned from them and went on to get a formal education. Today, while unemployed, I volunteer at a battered women's shelter where I encourage women from 18 to 80 to mother each other. Love has no limits! Mothering is a special kind of love that fills the heart and lifts the spirits. I hope all women will tap into the power of Mothering and reach out to people who may need a hug or someone to listen now. Words can't describe the power of a mother's love.

    Posted by mollywrites, 5 May 2010.

  • “Embrace the world and grace the world” is my mother’s motto. I learned about mothering by watching her in action. She loves all five children equally, devotes her life to her family, and holds the highest degree in her field of study. She showed us how to love ourselves first then to love others. Education was a priority and she made sure we heard her when she proclaimed “Education is the way out of poverty. Don’t get married until you have a career, you never know when you might have to support yourself and your family.” Now she has four successful daughters that are out there making a difference in the world and a son that keeps her laughing. She is kind, generous, honest and loving with arms that are always open and a heart that beats for world peace.
    Our mother taught us to stand up for the less fortunate, fight for what is right and to always give back to those in need. She was the one that marched against the war, went to jail to make a point and gathers signatures door to door for causes she believes in. Last election you would find her standing outside stores and setting up tables at universities to sign up voters. She marched for heath care reform and then worked the polling stations. She is 78. We knew every vote counted, to never to take for granted the power of the people and to never give up.
    My mother is my role model, my best friend and I am proud to say, has made the world a better place for being present.

    Posted by KleenSlate , 5 May 2010.

  • I and even more so my sisters are now my mother's mother. As my mother of 8 children in 10 years having just celebrated her 89th birthday is suffering from the early stages of alzheimers disease and her daughters have stepped up to care for her as she spent many years caring for us. I think how ironic this care is as we bath our mother in the same blue cast iron tub she use to bath us....was her hair as she use to wash ours, dress her as she use to dress us and feed her as she to feed us. But the one thing she still does for herself is to apply her make-up. Growing up I will always remember how mom taught us how to use make-up and to never leave the house without lipstick....needless to say my sisters and I always look fabulous when we leave our homes.
    Care for our parents comes full cycle. Many questions why we would do this instead of just putting mom in a 'home', but the choice my sisters and I have made is to care for mom as long as possible even as we care for our own families and self. Mom made room for us as we grew and now we are making room for mom. Happy Mothers Day..mom!

    Posted by rrussell, 5 May 2010.

  • Out of the many struggles, (hunger, poverty, and death of both parents before she was eighteen) my mother's regrets are not the hardships that life presented her. At the age of 76, she regrets not having an education in her formative years. She knew she was bright but, she often felt 'stuck' and unable to do better without an education.

    Her father would tell her that there only be enough money to put one child through school. And, her younger brother who would receive this opportunity, since he was the son. As if the words were spoken yesterday, my mother recalls her father saying, “Please do not begrudge me. When you have children and you have to choose, you will understand.” Even at a young age, my mother vehemently swore that if she ever had a daughter, she would give her the best education possible.

    And true to her promise, she worked at times, two jobs to pay for my private schooling during my formative years.

    On that sunny day in May 2001, she dawns on my Master's cap and gown and holds my diploma. Her eyes sparkle, she grins.. It is her day, her achievement. She has fulfilled her promise.

    Posted by julesfnp, 4 May 2010.

  • I was born in 1980 to a strong, proud, and independent first generation Chinese woman. She broke through the barriers of growing up as an Asian-American, dealing with diversity and a clash of cultures head-on. My mother has always taught me to be proud of who I am, but to remain humble and sincere. She has taught me to love whole heartedly, and care for more than just friends and family. She introduced me to the world of volunteering, teaching me empathy and compassion for the world and others. At 27, I became a step-mother to a beautiful 5 year-old. I have taken what I learned from my mother to love this precious child as if she were my own. Not only did I choose my husband; I chose her as well. She is now a proud big sister, showing her brother such wonderful love and care, proving she will be a wonderful Mother to her own children. Being a Mother has brought so much joy to my life. Watching my children laugh and play brings a smile to my face, and amazes me every day. I have become so lucky to be blessed with such a beautiful family.

    Posted by Candice Mason, 4 May 2010.