There comes a time for all of us to address the living situations of our elderly parents. It isn’t always an easy conversation to have, especially when broaching the subject of moving to a senior living community. Your parents may think they are better off staying in their home and living independently, but that might not be practical or safe any longer. So, how do you go about talking to your parents about moving to a well-equipped senior environment?
1. Start the Conversation Sooner Rather than Later
It is best to plant the seed before there is a crisis that forces your parents to move. Do some research and start planning the process together so there aren’t any surprises. This can make a difficult decision so much easier to handle when the time comes.
2. Get Together for the Talk
This is not a conversation that you want to have over the phone. You want to see one another face-to-face so that you get a sense of your parent’s emotions and they get to see your compassion. If you can’t get together in person, make use of video technology so you can clearly express yourselves to one another.
3. Listen and Remain Open-Minded
Remind yourself that the decision is ultimately that of your parents. They may have real fears and concerns about moving to an assisted living community. Be sure to listen to what those concerns are and let your parents know that you care and want to address all of their misgivings. Your demeanor of showing kindness will go a long way.
4. Take Your Time
Your parents may not be onboard or ready to make the move. Respect that and allow them to clearly express how they are feeling about the decision to relocate. You need to work with your parents at a pace that is mutually agreed upon. Otherwise, this could feel like a lot of pressure and even a threat, instead of a positive experience.
5. Visit Some Communities
One of the best ways to ease the transition is to visit senior living communities together. You can go in-person and also tour facilities online, such as taking the virtual apartment tours. When you make an appointment to visit a community, ask the staff if it is possible to interact with any of the residents to get a real sense of what living there is like.
6. Discuss Finances
Obviously, someone is going to have to pay for living expenses. It is very important to go over what this means financially. After you research costs, either help your parents with the budget or bring in a financial advisor to lay out a plan with both you and your parents. An independent and neutral party can lessen some of the anxiety around the topic.
7. Schedule a Time to Talk Again
This conversation isn’t going to happen in one visit. The information can be overwhelming and your parents need time to take it all in. So, make plans to revisit the topic at least one more time, or even several times. Unless this is an emergency situation, plan to talk this through often until a final decision is agreed upon.