In Celebration of Moms
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05/13/10 | The Women's Conference | 60 Comments




The Women's Conference Celebrates Moms

Maria Shriver on the profound power of motherhood and her own experience of being both a mother and a daughter.


 

We invited you to share your own personal stories about motherhood -- what your mom means to you or what it means to be a mom. The winners receive --


We've chosen the 3 winning comments. They are --

Kristy Campbell:

I’ve never felt as powerful as a mother as when I was 8 months pregnant sitting outside of the drug-testing lab with my teenage daughter. I had suspected something was going on with her and was adamant about finding out exactly what. As she screamed at me in the car about how much she hated me, I heard a voice come out of me that said… “Fine. Hate me. You'll hate me when you are 20, you'll hate me when you are 30, and you may hate me for the rest of your life. But, at least you will have a life from which to hate me. I am your mother. I am not your friend. And if you are doing drugs, I’m going to find out and deal with it.”

Our story has a drug-free happy ending and now 2 years later, my daughter is off to college and we are starting to evolve the mom/daughter relationship into a friendship. I love and value the current relationship I have with her, however, I know that if I hadn’t been a mother first to her, we would never be on this path to friendship.

stephsways:

I Love all the wonderful stories of 'Mommie and me,' by people who had warm milk by their bedsides and a fairytale told to them until their eye's were sealed with a loving kiss from Mom. At one time i couldn't stand to hear them. Mothers day was such a difficult time. It use to be, "Bah Hum-bug", on mothers day.

Mothers Day has always been a day of feeling guilty for giving Mom cards that didn't bare an ounce of truth of who we were. If i hadn't had such a great relationship with my own son, the yearly greiving over the relationship i never had with my Mom and achingly longed for, would have been unbearable. Yet as i go and grow through life i become more understanding of Mom's hurt and pain of never being loved by her own Mom. The suicide of my Dad, the loss of my oldest son, didn't help either one of us at all. But, when i tell you how much strength, courage, and love has risen in the midst of this family. Once i decided this generational abusive behavior would stop with me, It did. I was a single parent and my son who is now in law enforcement with a beautiful family. I was determined he would know without a doubt, he is loved. Now, i'm very passionate about leading others to a place of a 'Loving Reality'. I Love my Mom very much and now i know, she couldn't give what she never had.

Have a blessed Mother's Day and know, Love never fails.
May 2010

rrussell:

I and even more so my sisters are now my mother's mother. As my mother of 8 children in 10 years having just celebrated her 89th birthday is suffering from the early stages of alzheimers disease and her daughters have stepped up to care for her as she spent many years caring for us. I think how ironic this care is as we bath our mother in the same blue cast iron tub she use to bath us....was her hair as she use to wash ours, dress her as she use to dress us and feed her as she to feed us. But the one thing she still does for herself is to apply her make-up. Growing up I will always remember how mom taught us how to use make-up and to never leave the house without lipstick....needless to say my sisters and I always look fabulous when we leave our homes. 

Care for our parents comes full cycle. Many questions why we would do this instead of just putting mom in a 'home', but the choice my sisters and I have made is to care for mom as long as possible even as we care for our own families and self. Mom made room for us as we grew and now we are making room for mom. Happy Mothers Day..mom!


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Comments

  • Where do I begin? Well, in 1978 I was born. And from that moment, I had the most wonderful mom. She is the kind of mom who would do anything for me. I have nothing but fond memories of my fabulous childhood. I thought it would be hard to top. Boy, was I wrong. That is the irony. When I became a mom in 2007, my life was turned upside down. Being Carson's mom is something I thank God for EVERYDAY. I am a working mom, and I thought I was always meant to be great at that. I was wrong. I was put here to be a great MOM. I am constantly reminded of that by Carson every day. Without his hugs and kisses, adventures and misses I would be the woman I am today!

    Posted by jennieb1978, 4 May 2010.

  • I sm a mother 8 times. When I heard the words"It's Cancer on Oct 06 2006 I called my girls at 10 AM and Nan arrived by plane at 3pm and took charge of everything. She and the other children stepped up to the plate and stayed involved till I could manage. Cancer is a gift of Love for me. I take nothing for granted these days. I exercise, eat right and give a hand to others when needed. I know I make a difference.

    Posted by Peg Heglund, 4 May 2010.

  • My mother is not perfect - just like me - I am not perfect too, but we both have a common thing: we will strive to be a better mom each day for our precious children.

    Motherhood is about putting your children first above yourself. I will do things that I never imagine for the sake of my children. Even when I am sick, I will still think about the wellbeing of my children.

    Motherhood is not just providing food and shelter, but it's also how we can shape that little heart to be a better person, fill them up with love, encouragement, faith and guide them to be a better man/ woman every day - step by step.

    I am lucky to have my mom as my role model and I hope one day my children will be able to say that I have been a great role model in their lives.

    Posted by jwibowo, 4 May 2010.

  • I became a mother for the first time at age 42. It was the most glorious experience of my life. Here he was, our little baby boy - adopted from a young girl in Connecticut, who was wise beyond her youth; who was more beautiful than any young girl I had ever known. She told us to think of her as our "surrogate," during our courtship. Her family took us in and for 3 weeks we blended as a family and looked forward to the years of watching our little boy grow up.

    As an adoptive mom, I missed out on some of the things natural moms get to experience, like giving birth, watching and feeling your baby grow inside of you, having 9 months to prepare for the arrival…but there was one thing I was determined to do with my baby – breastfeed him. I took special hormones for 2 months, since learning we’d have a baby soon. I had researched it and learned it was possible. Though it would never be the level of production as a natural mother, it would be the real deal, with no harm to the baby and it would provide another layer of bonding with my baby boy.

    We remained in Connecticut 1 week after his birth, to finish the interstate transfer adoption papers. We watched our son’s birth, I cut the umbilical cord, and we had him with us in our room the entire hospital stay. He was our son. Then it came - the call a newly adoptive mom (and dad), dreads ever getting. It was the social worker; the birth father would not allow the adoption to proceed. He had never been in the picture, nor involved in either the pregnancy or the adoption. It was the most devastating news of my life. I’ve never felt a deeper pain, a greater loss, a sick-to-my-stomach-gonna-throw-up piercing, most unbearable excruciating hurt of my life – worse than being told by doctors that I was perhaps too old to bear children (though they didn’t know for sure). Kill me now. After 1 week with our baby boy, nursing him, caring for him and falling madly in love with him, we’d have to return him to his birth family. The birth mom was devastated; she was no longer with the father and didn’t have the means to raise that child. She would now be forced to.

    It’s been 4 years since that devastating experience, but I know now why all of this happened. Back then; I refused to understand the logic behind it. “Why would God allow it?” I used to think. This baby boy made me a mom for the first time in my life, but it’s my little girl, the one we brought home 6 months later that made me a mom for life. Though I didn’t get to experience her birth, nor did I get the chance to breastfeed as I did the first one, she is the one that penetrates my heart with the deepest and richest love a mother could ever have for a child. I now understand God’s reason. I will always love my baby boy and don’t regret a moment of what we went through, because it led us to our little girl. She is the one that was meant to be with us.

    Posted by Jeanette C, 4 May 2010.

  • The day I became a mother, was the day before my oldest daughter was born. I had not listened to my OB doctor and continued to work long hours. I thought "heck women worked in the fields and gave birth there why couldn't I sit at a desk and do my job." Little did I realize I had jeopardized my unborn childs life. Never had I felt so much guilt as when my doctor said after my stress test that my child was under stress and so was I. I went home and woke up about 3am my water had broke 7 weeks early. My husband and I rushed to the hospital. I had an amnio test and waited for the results on whether my child was alive and what would happen. As I layed in my hospital bed I made deals with GOD, Please GOD if you are going to take her, take her, just please don't let her suffer for my mistakes. I asked my grandmother to help her in heaven and to love her. Moments later my doctor walked in and said "I don't know who you know up there(heaven)especially with all that was wrong with you, but I have a healthy baby and I am inducing labor. Now Simone is a beautiful and smart 19 year old in college. I gave my child to GOD, and he gave her back for me to be a mother.

    Posted by toniquesada, 4 May 2010.

  • What it means to be a mom? Waking up early every morning, to make her breakfast and wake her up in a snuggly way, to make sure her day starts off great. Preparing a healthy lunch, making sure she has all of her homework and a jacket to keep her warm. Then spending 30 minutes to throw myself together and off to work and school. Working 9 hours, picking her up, doing homework, coaching her softball team, running her Girl Scout Troop, feeding her a healthy dinner and going to bed to start it all over again in the morning.
    I attend all of her school plays, conferences and events. Always being the parent to help out, donate supplies and volunteer for every event. All the while, running her from one doctor appointment to another trying to figure out what is wrong. Why is she sick every day? Finally after 4 years, we find the answer. Then running her to the ER in the middle of the night to find out she needs emergency surgery. Receiving the call from school that something is wrong. She is not performing at level. More doctors appointments and test after test. Loving every precious moment. I would not trade it for anything in the world! I love being a MOM!

    Posted by cobbtammy, 4 May 2010.

  • My Mother died when my thrid daughter was born,infact I lost all the elder women of my family that year. My mother was the greatest women I have ever know. We came from a time when Native American women did not expect to suceed in the world of white folks.
    She said to me I could do whatever I wanted to do with my life. Every time I challenage something new I hear her words in my heart. The pain of something new never out weighs the words she spoke to me.
    I have now spoke to all nine of my daughters and four sons these words that carried my to the top as a Indian women.

    Posted by Betsy707, 4 May 2010.

  • I am the youngest of nine and my mom was always there for me when I was growing up we didn't have alot but I always had cloths to wear and food my mom worked nights in a factory as did my dad. when I was preg with both of my kids my mom was there for me and helped me through the first child.I could talk to her about anything unfortantly my wonderful hard working mother passed away just two days before my daughter was born but I know she is always with me that was 26 years ago and I still miss her more than I can say.

    Posted by jillo1, 4 May 2010.

  • What does my mother mean to me? Oy! So much! She is the one who can say something and have it hit me in a way that no one else can. She has serious power, as most mothers do. When I was growing up, we had a very charged relationship. Her moods had infinite power over me -- which of course, drove me batty. Now that I'm all growed up -- and living 6k miles away, the tension eases. But she still plays a role like no other. Her thoughts, her opinions are probably still the ones that are the most powerful in my life, even as I'm in a committed relationship, etc. The power of mothers...

    Posted by meliayates, 4 May 2010.

  • I celebrate a Collective Mom. I am one of six children; my birth Mom has an amazing gift of making each us feel like her one and only. Quite a feat for a Mom raising an active and connected Catholic family in Connecticut. At the age of 10, my Mom went to the store to return to our lives many years later. My dear Dad jumped into Mothering, joining a Collective Mom made up of Sisters, Cousins, Brothers, Aunts, Uncles, Grandparents, Godparents, Art Teachers, Neighbors, Church Friends, Dance and Gymnastics Instructors, Choir Leader, Sorority Sisters, College Professors, Moms of My Friends. I am grateful. I am changed. I am stronger, more well-rounded and especially gifted because of them. Happy Mothers Day to my Collective Mom!

    Posted by Chickie, 4 May 2010.